Freshman Year Survival Guide (13+)


If you look up “freshman advice” on YouTube, you’re gonna get a lot of these beauty gurus telling you all these nice, uplifting bits of insight. The thing is though: they’re beauty gurus. They all look way too good to be giving practical advice for most kids. High school was a cakewalk for them. They look incredible. They’re all holding phones in their videos. Why are they doing that? Most of the embarrassing stories are like dropping books in a hallway, oh how traumatic. Do you wanna know my embarrassing first day story? I leaned against the wall, and I accidentally triggered the fire alarm. That’s actually a lie that didn’t happen, but that would have been a good story gloss if it did happen I’m entering my senior year. I went to normal Public high school Fancy Charter school and even a cushioned alternative school for the criminally insane I’ve been around and I’ve seen every single kind of freshman there is and you want to know what I have the most legit pointers That you can find anywhere else on the internet. There’s no need for Wikihow with me guys This is your one-stop-shop on how to survive freshman year, okay? Are you buckled up? Radical. Do not stress out. Do you realize how silly you’re being by worrying? Yeah, it’s your first day Yeah, you have no idea what to do This is something totally new but guess what you’re entering with the new wave of kids who are just as lost and scared as you are. Are you have to be a moron if you think that you’re the only one who doesn’t know what’s going on you have to be An even bigger Moron if you think that the schools don’t realize in prep for this – feel free to get lost feel free to Not be able to open up your locker feel free to walk into the wrong classroom Everyone is expecting you to – this is the free period Where you can get away with this stuff your concerns are lost in a sea Of other people’s concerns you do not matter The first day is kind of like the hunger games where you have to dress to impress Eventually all you guys slaughter each other. Everybody’s nervous, they take it way too Seriously everything that happens is forgotten in a week and eventually everyone you know is dead Do not stand in the middle of the hallway if there is something that these beauty gurus all got right, It’s that you’re not supposed to be a human Roadblock when everyone else is trying to get past you stick to the walls or go to the bathroom if you need to stand still? Dummy Keep your head low in the first day and observe. What’s the lunch Situation like where are your old friends? Who look like new friends? What’s the atmosphere in every single classroom? Get a lay of the land. Be strategic and come back tomorrow guns blazing with better knowledge of what’s up? Please for the love of God keep good hygiene. As a freshman you gotta smell fresh since you’re still a pubescent troll You’re not allowed to go weeks without showering until your junior your depression hits do you want friends shower first, then we’ll talk Get involved in stuff like a nerd whether you’re planning for college or not? It’s super cool to have extra stuff on your resume later on Employers eat that stuff up plus half the clubs at your school are probably going to Disney World in a couple years anyway You’re probably thinking along too old for Disney World. That’s not fun anymore Yeah you want with your mom and siblings try going to Disney world with a group of your Seventeen-year-Old friends down the road that is a thousand times more fun. I Get it you’re on Youtube right now. You’re on the internet You’re probably home by your the gulimero Social guess what you should probably leave your house at least once a week quit spending most of your time inside most of the stuff that you’re actually going to remember from this time period Our adventures you go on with your friends. Break into neighborhood pools Write dirty words on the inside of that abandoned boarded up house in town.
Walk around past curfew That’s half the fun of being a kid just don’t do anything to hurt yourself or anyone else, and you should be good Date everybody. Date girls, date boys, date non-binary folks Experiment break up get your emotions drop-kicked into mount doom of mordor Here’s the thing you’re still young you’re still a baby you’re going to value some experience under your belt when you’re ready to get legit in a Few years Do not be cocky sit the frick down. Son. You ain’t all that you were just in Middle school like 15 minutes ago Don’t bother scrapping with the upPerclassmen they don’t care and they can see right through your cute little swag charade go sip on your juice box with the rest of your Peers until you get your act together Do not good seniors if they say you’re so mature for your age run if they say you’re not like other freshmen run It’s all lies. It’s all fake it’s all cheap 99.9% of the time they just want to do the hanky-panky vibes with a 14 year old and leave you in the dust because you’re Still an easily manipulated baby. They’re savage they have no heart and they have zero chill Do not send nude pictures for the love of God every picture of yourself that you send is equivalent to handing a loaded gun to Somebody what happens if they form beef with you that gets dropped on Instagram and suddenly everybody knows where your boobies look like if you’re extra lucky cops will get involved and You know sending pictures of your fourteen-year-old ding-dong is low-key illegal as frick Do you want to get thrown onto one of those sex offender registries knock on all the doors in your neighborhood when you’re 40 years? Old your hair’s falling out Hello, ma’am. I moved in down the road. I’m just letting you know that I’m a registered sex offender. Oh, really What did you do? I sent booty face to my senior boyfriend in Freshman year But it’s okay because I know that he loki loves me deep down and he leaked my pictures neat guy matt. It’s okay It’s fine even though it’s bothering all the babies of my fortune your friends at the time It’s I understand a lot of y’all are going to do this anyway Don’t even bother listening to me why even watch this video if you’re not going to do what I suggest at the very least Do not include your face in anything, but love of God don’t oh don’t be a little Don’t get pregnant if you’re doing the heterosexual sex lives with you’re not seeing your significant other make sure that there’s some protection going on Condoms pills any of those other fancy alternatives. They’re all good and they cost a lot less than a human baby I promise you kids cost a lot more than you’re able to afford flipping burgers at that fast-food restaurant down the Road Breakups they are going to happen. I promise you and they are going to hurt They’re going to sting and they’re gonna build character in you feel free to lay on the couch Cry for day eating cookie dough you’re totally allowed to it’s encouraged just don’t do anything stupid like alcohol drugs Self-harm no guy or girl is worth ruining your life over you silly goose Especially when you’re still a baby and the heat of the moment, it’s important to remember 30 years down the road You’re not going to be single and hopping around bars thinking yourself man This dude was hot and stuff, but he’s not as great as that senior who slept with my friend when I was 14 He’s the reason I can never trust anyone again last and most importantly I’m I’m going to sound like your parents for a sec watch any other video on the subject on YouTube And they’re all going to tell you to focus on your schoolwork Why? Because it’s the only thing that actually Matters to them when they’re making the video I get it all the social stuff is the most important thing in the world I pinky you happy’s because you’re chilling with aren’t gonna be in the picture in a few months high school is dramatic That’s why there’s so many movies about it Everything changes at a rapid pace, and that’s kind of half the fun the drama is intense and importunate in the moment But in a couple weeks, it’s going to be totally insignificant I can’t even remember half the stuff that went down my freshman year But I do remember the high and low emotions that were associated with them Consider your years in high school is like a beta version of your life as you mingle You’ll work you eventually realize that everything is meaningless and then you burn out Here’s the thing though the stakes are low right now You’re technically not legally responsible for most of your actions until you turn 18 So use these formative years to experiment do crazy stuff while you still can because once you grow up It is significantly less fun If you’re just now going into high school chill out if you’ve been in high school for a little bit You’re still new get with a program and get your act together if you’re not in high school And you’re just watching this video to relive your high school days get over it old man your youth was fleeting And you’ll never get it back your shallow attempts of reliving it are pathetic that is inevitable nothing you do matters There’s no afterlife you cannot return hey, it’s 2:20 in the morning, and if you enjoyed this video subscribe, and it’s nice I’m sorry I’ll try harder next time. Maybe while you’re busy doing that you click on that Bell thing-a-ma-boob and your phone will shake every time I say something the choice is yours dude lady Non-binary individual oh my God. I have a dentist appointment tomorrow it can be painful. I’m just

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100 thoughts on “Freshman Year Survival Guide (13+)

  1. Dude, no fair. While y'all freshmen date and have some fun shit I go to a highschool with uniforms and it's only for one gender. I'm jealous.

  2. Oh my god, your sooo right about blocking the fucking halls in middle school it was always people blocking the entrance to the hallways but now in high school it’s blocking the fucking top of the stair case

  3. Well upper classmen will talk shit and so if u talk shit back they’ll leave u alone for the rest of the year and they’ll go bother some other freshman it works 80% of the time

  4. Its kind of funny that on my first day of my freshmen year someone actually leaned on a wall and pressed the fire alarm.

  5. At my school everyone stands in the middle of the hall talking, as long as you're in a big group no one will bother you

  6. I’m 14 and well is this what it’s like in American or generally just European high schools? You know just wondering… cuz honestly my school is super boring??? Let’s just say nothing like what you said applies accept for the part where you said study even though I only study when it actually matters, which is like never so yea. And honestly the most evil thing I’ve probably done so far is finish all my work before the teacher teaches it and get super bored and start crawling on the floor around the classroom annoying both my teacher and classmates also if you’re wondering I did not get detention. Yay

  7. I'm a freshman at shadle park high school, beat the shit outta 3 kids yesterday. I hate kids. All kids. Ages 0-17

  8. Freshmen just need to know there place. You are 8th graders who are in high school. Just stay out of everyone’s way and don’t act surprised if people mess with you. You will get your chance to do the same when you are a upper class men.

  9. Way back a girl in my class was self harming I didn’t know why in my mind I was like bitchhhh please you haven’t even started life I was (20 at the time)

  10. Dont make your crush worry about you killing yourself lmao
    Edit: no seriously. Dont do it, and I’m pretty sure my crush hates me cuz she blocked me on every single social media possible. She even blocked my Business IG account for my music (literally not even a joke and I didn’t even try to follow her LMAO)

  11. Thank goodness those freshman/middleschool years are over. After 10th grade it it’s better people wise. But no one cares about their appearance anymore it’s all about the freaking 20 page research paper on why puppies don’t need to be neutered

  12. I remember my first year of highschool I was freshman my friends and I were bored so we decided to go to this abandoned Chinese restaurant and my friend had some fire crackers and we found this sriracha sauce he puts the firework inside but the firework blew up the bottle of sauce and we were filled with sriracha sauce and the sauce was expired so we smelled like chili the whole day

  13. I was once a freshman in high school I went up stairs and got to the 3rd floor my friend jack had some oil I don't really know why actually and he soaked the entrance of every class room in half of the third floor we set up a camera on the top of the roof hung it and it took 45 minutes for everyone to slip but by God I was waiting and when the first person fell I died because I saw piles of people in hallways and it was so funny I died

    Ps always try to act like escanor quiet, strong, calm

  14. My big advice is don't get attached to any Seniors your first year because they are gone before you know it and you should have good relationships within your own class before having friends in other classes

  15. There is no Freshman in my country but we eventually change schools at the age of 13.
    It is my first year and one of my friends had already talk shit to the senior. That senior eventually beat him up in a place where nobody goes. "Don't mess with Seniors"

  16. This doesn’t work when you live in a small town in a small school. Like I see all the highschool movies and school looks so much fun, and in mu school theres only one group per grade, an avarage of 20 students per grade and theres no drama or crap. I Wish I was in a bigger school.

  17. heres a tip, dont date "anybody" unless you want to get bullied, if you want to date the same sex, expect everyone to know and expect to get bullied, atleast where I live. If you're a girl its not as bad theres groups of people who are LGBT so if you are gay or lesbian or anything like that, try to stick with that croud. I know this from learning from some of my frineds mistakes

  18. Freshman year was generally easy for me because of easy honors classes and no bullying. However in Sophomore year, that is when shit gets real for classes because of the overwhelming amount of tests and quizzes every week. Also you know those kids that don't study and get an A? Well not anymore LOL

  19. My suggestion for freshmen is as soon as you get in find a sport to play it places you with upper classmen that if you befriend them they will protect you in harm stand by your side and be a good friend to you,sport players often get recognition making them more popular and viewed better by others,this also makes it easier dating wise,and if you play a sport that you like you have more motivation to keep your grades which will make your parents happier.

  20. i would love to go hang out with my freainds but i cant becues i have over pertetiv parents and i cant sneek out becues a coupal years ago i was like 10feet away but they didint know and then they all most call the cops

  21. All my friends are seniors (I’m a freshman) but I’m only friends with them cause we all weebs and we all love dnd . Now I’m scared that they are going to ruin my highschool years…..

  22. When I first went to Middle school and everyone stares at me and the teacher said oh yea sorry you don't have this class anymore and everyone stares at me.

  23. hang out w the cool kids not the popular kids, fuck all the girls you can and do hella drugs, youll have fun, i guarantee it lmao

  24. I was here few months ago getting so nervous about highschool like a little child but it is actually not that bad. I LOVE highschool SO MUCH! So much fun and I just love it. I would just say I was surprised of lots of kids vaping or those stuffs but except for that I love it. Just stay away from bad attitude kids and it will be totally fine. I LOVE HIGHSCHOOL💕💕💕

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