Don’t Even Try To Out Stupid Donald Trump


LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, AS YOU MIGHT KNOW, TRUMP HAS PLUNGED
THE WORLD INTO A TRADE WAR. BUT SOME PEOPLE ARE STILL TRYING
DESPERATELY TO STOP IT, LIKE EUROPEAN COMMISSION PRESIDENT
AND MAN NOT IMPRESSED BY HIS GRANDSON’S MAGIC TRICK,
JEAN-CLAUDE JUNCKER. JUNCKER MET WITH TRUMP AT THE
WHITE HOUSE TODAY TO TRY TO TALK TRUMP OUT OF HIS TRADE WAR WITH
THE E.U. AND IN ANTICIPATION OF THIS
VISIT, YESTERDAY TRUMP TWEETED, “THE EUROPEAN UNION IS COMING TO
WASHINGTON TOMORROW TO NEGOTIATE A DEAL ON TRADE. I HAVE AN IDEA FOR THEM. BOTH THE U.S. AND THE E.U. DROP
ALL TARIFFS, BARRIERS, AND SUBSIDIES! THAT WOULD FINALLY BE CALLED
FREE MARKET AND FAIR TRADE! HOPE THEY DO IT, WE ARE READY–
BUT THEY WON’T!” ( LAUGHTER )
WELL, NOT WITH THAT ATTITUDE. ( LAUGHTER )
THAT’S LIKE IF YOUR PSYCHIATRIST SAID, “IT WOULD BE GREAT IF WE
COULD FIGURE OUT YOUR ISSUES WITH YOUR MOTHER. BUT AIN’T NO WAY THAT’S
HAPPENING, MAMA’S BOY. UH-OH, HERE COME THE
WATERWORKS. GO AHEAD AND SQUIRT THEM.” AND JUNCKER IS READY TO GO TO
THE MATTRESSES HERE. RESPONDING TO TRUMP’S THREATS OF
STEEL AND ALUMINUM TARIFFS, JUNCKER SAID, “SO NOW WE WILL
ALSO IMPOSE IMPORT TARIFFS. THIS IS BASICALLY A STUPID
PROCESS, THE FACT THAT WE HAVE TO DO THIS. BUT WE HAVE TO DO IT. WE WILL NOW IMPOSE TARIFFS ON
MOTORCYCLES, HARLEY-DAVIDSON; ON BLUE JEANS, LEVIS; ON
BOURBON. WE CAN ALSO DO STUPID.” ( LAUGHTER ). ( CHEERS )
OH. OH. OH, WE KNOW EUROPEANS CAN DO
STUPID. I’VE MET PIERS MORGAN. ( LAUGHTER )
BUT, HOLD ON, JUNCKER. DO YOU REALLY THINK YOU’RE GOING
TO OUT-STUPID THIS GUY?>>BING, BING, BONG, BONG, BING,
BING, BING. YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS, RIGHT? (STAR SPANGLED BANNER)
GOD BLESS THE UNITED SHTATES.>>Stephen: SO, YEAH, YEAH, GOOD
LUCK OUT-DUMBING THAT. HE’S LIKE THE BOBBY FISCHER OF
BEING A MORON– HE’S ALWAYS THREE MOVES AHEAD, AND HE’S
GROPING THE QUEEN. BUT TRUMP JUST WANTS EVERYONE TO
GET OFF HIS CASE, TWEETING, “WHEN YOU HAVE PEOPLE SNIPPING
AT YOUR HEELS DURING A NEGOTIATION, IT WILL ONLY TAKE
LONGER TO MAKE A DEAL, AND THE DEAL WILL NEVER BE AS GOOD AS IT
COULD HAVE BEEN WITH UNITY. NEGOTIATIONS ARE GOING REALLY
WELL, BE COOL. THE END RESULT WILL BE WORTH
IT!” “BE COOL”?>>Jon: BE COOL!>>Stephen: BE COOL.>>Jon: BE COOL, DADDY.>>Stephen: THAT’S WHAT YOU
SAY WHEN YOU’RE NEGOTIATING FOR A BAG OF WEED, NOT PLUNGING THE
WORLD INTO AN ECONOMIC CRISIS. “IT’S JUST A FEW HUNDRED BILLION
DOLLARS WORTH OF TARIFFS. CHILLAX, BRO-SEF.” ( LAUGHTER )
THIS AFTERNOONA THIS AFTERNOON, THIS JUST HAPPENED? THIS AFTERNOON,
TRUMP AND JUNCKER AGREED THAT EUROPE WOULD AGREE TO IMPORT
MORE LIQUEFIED NATURAL GAS AND SOYBEANS WHILE NEGOTIATIONS
CONTINUED. AND THAT’S A GOOD THING, BECAUSE
THE PEOPLE GETTING HURT THE MOST BY ALL THIS ARE FARMERS. FIRST, TRUMP SLAPPED A TARIFF ON
CHINESE SOLAR PANELS. THEN CHINA CAME BACK AND HIT US
WITH A TARIFF RIGHT IN THE SOYBEANS. NOW TRUMP’S HITTING BACK WITH A
TARIFF ON SEAFOOD AND COSMETIC PRODUCTS. SO IT’S ABOUT TO GET A LOT MORE
EXPENSIVE TO PUT MASCARA ON YOUR GOLDFISH. ( LAUGHTER )
THESE– THESE ARE TRUMP’S PEOPLE, AND HE IS RUINING THEIR
LIVELIHOODS. CHINA IS BY FAR THE BIGGEST
CONSUMER OF AMERICAN SOYBEANS, AND NOW U.S. SOYBEAN PRICES HAVE
PLUNGED TO A TEN-YEAR LOW. OH, NO… IS WHAT I WOULD SAY IF
I KNEW HOW MUCH SOYBEANS USED TO COST. ( LAUGHTER )
SO TRUMP IS SCRAMBLING TO APPEASE HIS FARMER BASE,
TWEETING THINGS LIKE, “CHINA IS TARGETING OUR FARMERS, WHO THEY
KNOW I LOVE AND RESPECT, AS A WAY OF GETTING ME TO CONTINUE
ALLOWING THEM TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE U.S. THEY ARE BEING VICIOUS IN WHAT
WILL BE THEIR FAILED ATTEMPT. WE WERE BEING NICE– UNTIL NOW!”
“YES, I LOVE ALL MY FARMERS. THE OLD McDONALDS, THE ONE IN
THE DELL, THE INSURANCE GUYS– ♪ I LOVE FARMERS
BUM, BA, DUM, DA, DUM DA, DUM, DUM” ♪
BUT TRUMP IS– ( APPLAUSE )
ARE THEY A SPONSOR? ARE THEY A SPONSOR? THEY’RE A SPONSOR! AND TRUMP IS PUTTING OUR MONEY
WHERE HIS STUPID MOUTH IS BECAUSE YESTERDAY, HE ANNOUNCED
PLANS TO SEND $12 BILLION TO FARMERS HURT BY RETALIATORY
TARIFFS. THAT’S A GOOD DEAL. NORMALLY, TRUMP ONLY PAYS
130 GRAND TO PEOPLE HE’S SCREWED. ( LAUGHTER )
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) SO IT LOOKS LIKE– NOTHING? NOTHING?
TOO LATE! SO IT LOOKS LIKE IT’S MOVING
FORWARD. AND IN ORDER TO IMPLEMENT IT,
THE DEPARTMENT OF AGRICULTURE ANNOUNCED IT WILL UTILIZE A
GREAT DEPRESSION-ERA LAW TO SEND PAYMENTS TO PRODUCERS OF DAIRY,
HOGS, AND CERTAIN CROPS. AND YOU KNOW THINGS ARE GOING
AWESOME WHEN YOUR SOLUTION IS, “HEY, WHAT DID WE DO DURING THE
GREAT DEPRESSION?” WE’LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH “CBS
THIS MORNING”‘S JOHN DICKERSON.

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Post navigation

100 thoughts on “Don’t Even Try To Out Stupid Donald Trump

  1. Glad I'm Native American not a decedent gr earo teach like all of you whites people n your orange white is also one of you hahahahahahah

  2. This turd Stephen Colbert should know there is nothing fun about this shit. Its crazy that people like this can joke about this

  3. Funny how people like Stephen who call Trump stupid, made less money than Trump last year alone. I guess he's not as stupid as Stephen claims to be. LoL

  4. Trump is such a joke. And he is absolutely stupid. Just look at the dummy. He’s such a disgrace to America. Please America vote him out. Tell it like it is Steven. That’s what Trump can’t stand the truth which he knows nothing about. Trump has lied to the framers among everyone else.

  5. So similar to India's situation 🤦🤦🤦🤦 Leaders are busy with creating headlines rather than listening to experts to stabilize the economy!

  6. Just so y'all know, after Trump is re-elected, which is already a sure deal. He will no longer give a shit about the left's opinion. He will completely destroy y'alls way of life,and I as a conservative Republican, will laugh at all your idiocies as you mow my fucking yard.

  7. Don't Even Try To Out Stupid Donald Trump
    Yeah because you would probably be even more successful than he is. GREAT stuff he has done for America.

  8. Don't Even Try To Out Stupid Donald Trump
    Yeah because you would probably be even more successful than he is. GREAT stuff he has done for America.

  9. Stephen good sense of humor..
    Trump loves attension , he performances everywhere .. he can not touch people's heart. in simply way

  10. Insane how stupid you guys are 😂🤦‍♂️ imagine mocking the leader of this country on national television even though he’s doing so much good 😂

  11. U guys are getting material from trump. I mean hes even making stephan money. And its ridiculous how disrespectful the american media is to thier own president. Its embarassing to watch youll. The jokes on you. Hes a pretty cool dude and honestly speaking the only humourous and entertaining president of the 20th century and guess what. Hes actually doing soemthing unlike obama who spent 64 trillion dollars and invented obama care. Thats all he did in 2 terms. U guys are making fun of trump but its obvious the liberalist parties are paying u to subliminally infect the minds of millions through insults and propaganda. Its shameful and whats worse is your making more money at his cost. Hes probably going to be the one great president that america has had since lincoln and u guys are shitting all over it. Its disgusting to watch . Shame on you all for such disrespect. And for whom? A bunch of marshmallow people with 1st world problems who dont seem to like his direct approach on handling real issues.

  12. I don't understand "stupid", I guess….Bernie Sanders invokes fear in the American voter because he's a Democratic Socialist….He's not a Lenin, Stalin, Hitler Socialist….He's an American Socialist like every American is when s/he accepts Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, food stamps,  Day Care, on and on….There are truckloads of social programs in this country…Take your blinders off, people; and, join the 20th and 21st centuries…Socialism is something we've all benefited from since FDR, for crisake…I don't expect a single trumpette to read my words here; simply because, trumpettes can't read.  But, the left can…remember, two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts do.  Vote Bernie or die with trump for another 4 years.

  13. Libtards 🤦‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏿‍♀️

    (I had to use every color so that the liberals wouldn't call me racist)

  14. Wow..talk about how stupid trump is.. lol Colbert and his fascist pig commy followers are the epitome of STUPID. As shown by the liberal fascist pig dumbocrate comments..lol

  15. Trump is funny though I am shocked how Americans chose such a person for president post.I think they lost their brains while giving votes.Everywhere there's total chaos because of his irrelevant strategies and policies and Americans have to think we are globally connected to each other in today's era .America first policy will not gonna work .It was just bait to allure Americans..Your couple of illogical policies will definitely effect your country also sooner or later because everything is chain and connected.

  16. He ( Trump) is the president & will be re elected again, I can't wait to see your faces when that happens!!! You ( Stephen) are nobody and actually very boring & stupid, the crowd that applauds everything you say, is even more stupid than you. You remind me of the emu in the Liberty commercial, are you related?

  17. Poor Colbert hes got nouthing he is so pathetic the only thing he can talk about is President Donald Trump. His show is getting boring. His life line is President Donald Trump. He needs new material. Its getting old . The fake news cheerleader squad is pathetic

  18. WAIT…what if …this guy could join the Eu and USA in one big union!
    The no way Britain would want to get out of it!
    We wouldn't have to remove our many nuke warheads over there, just leave them in the ground.
    NO Turkey…s.

  19. Donny Dumb Nuts is even dumber now. His dementia is progressing rapidly. His letter to the Turkish president was 4th grade level. This ignorant orange pile of s**t is the dumbest living thing to enter the Whitehouse. And that includes past Whitehouse pets.

  20. I have always believed that the average US citizen was an intelligent person…Until now..!! Why are you letting this absolute idiot bring your country down ?? The USA is fast becoming the laughing stock of the whole world !! This total moron needs to.be chased out of office ASAP..

  21. Who needs to try when we’ve got people like you who need not exert any effort doing it for us? Ya Pro-baby-killing fake “Catholic”. I wouldn’t present for holy communion if I were you.

  22. Stephen Colbert you have the dumbest show because your jokes are only for people with IQ under 70. I guess your public are Demonrats and liberals.

  23. Stephen Colbert has become such a tool in the last few years. He renders himself virtually unwatchable unless you get pleasure from cringing hard. Nothing he said was funny just now and his childish antics don't help his comedy one bit.

  24. Go on my people at least we ain't as stupid to bring in a president with no brains .and when you just decided fuck it we will pick out some fruit from a bag and what ever comes out shall be our president and you lot picked an 🍊 tangerine they are nice but sometimes u get the sour ones and u lot got the worst of the worst ubgot one that's gone off hahaha and no thank god I'm not English either their all scum. Again for borris Johnston haha ya big child..

  25. Nuckle head, great when he stands up to status quo and fair practices with other countries to start with, but just keep the mouth shut, you know the old addage better to be thought of as stupid then to speak and erase all doubt

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *